DH just got home from visiting our ward Bishop. Apparently, someone from our ward found someone's facebook page and a blog. Rich and Ann will be getting called before the disciplinary board, and will be excommunicated from the church; a blow we all knew was coming, but we were not ready for. My baptism was set to be on Saturday. I still plan on holding that schedule, but we will not be doing it at church. I will have Rich do it privately with just our family. I know we are not the first family to be kicked out of a church for polygamy, and we will not be the last. No longer do we have to hide. We can be open about our family, and be proud of our family. God has given us each to each other, and I will never turn my back on the blessings He has poured out on us.
On the other part of my life...my ex called and said that he had moved back to Tennessee. I was shocked, until I heard why. His cousin had a logging company, and wanted Ex to buy it out and take over the trucking side. He bought 8 trucks, and is going to be passing on a family business to my daughter when the time comes for him to give it up. What a blessing! This was his lifelong dream, and his hope to give his daughter something to inherit.
Crazy, mixed up day...
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Sunday, August 29, 2010
A daunting task is at hand
I try not to play the comparison game with other women. It is not fair of me to measure myself to someone else, when the only standard I should be worried about is how I measure up to Jesus. However, that is so hard to do. The woman whom I most often compare myself to is a standard that I will never be able to reach. So, why do I do it? Its frustrating, but I do it anyway. Who is this woman? Well, I believe she is the one all Godly women should strive to be like. She can be found in the book of Proverbs, chapter 31. Using The Message, an interpretation of the Scriptures, I want to share with you the woman I want to become.
"Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it." I do not EVER want to give my dh reason to distrust me, or to question my motives for anything I do. I want my motives and actions to be above reproach at all times.
"She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day." Anyone who knows me, knows that I hate mornings. I do not function well early in the morning. However, now that I have a large family, I must become more diligent is getting up and making sure everyone is fed. Victoria starts school this week. With prayer, I start work this week, also. I am taking it upon myself to ensure that she has a filling breakfast to keep her going until lunch time. If I eat also, I will be less apt to stop at McDonald's for food on my way to work, too.
"She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden." I will be working outside the home. I have chosen to do this for a few reasons, but the most important being that I need a break from this house in order to be a kind, sweet person. I have chosen (or it chose me...) a profession that I am skilled in, and that pays very well. I consider my calling to be an interpreter in ASL to be not only a gift from God to teach His children about Him, but also a wonderful way to care for my family. With the money I will be earning, I will be able to care for my family is a wise way. Father, please show me how to be a faithful steward of the provision You will provide!
"First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, and is in no hurry to call it quits for the day." I have learned that if I stay in my jammies all day, the only thing I want to do is sleep and be lazy. I MUST get up, get dressed and be about my work. When I put on my clothes, it seems to make me more diligent about doing my job. Also, I take pride in making sure that, most days, I dress well. I do not want my husband to look at me and see a slob. I want him to be proud of me, even if I am just at home. I want to look my best, as often as I can, to encourage myself to be the best I can, and to please his eye.
"She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking." I am not prideful about many things, but I am proud that I was wise enough to learn from my Grandma and my Mom how to take care of a home, and how to cook filling, healthy, and inexpensive meals for my family. I am still learning to sew to the skill level I want, but that will come with practice. I still have much to learn, but no one in my home goes hungry!!!
"She doesn't worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks...she designs gowns and sells them...her clothes are well made and elegant, she always faces tomorrow with a smile." I can't wait until I can get my sewing machine and start sewing clothes again. I want to make pajamas for everyone, and even some clothes for Victoria to wear for school and church. I want to dress modestly, covering myself well, as to not let the world see the body that only my husband is to know. I want to make some long skirts for myself, and my sister wives if they wish. I long for my clothes to not only flatter, but to be lovely. I want my husband to look at me and be honored that I am keeping myself for him alone, and looking nice to bring respect to myself, as well as to him. My smile and positive attitude MUST proceed me each day. I want to look at each new day as a blessing from the Lord, and as a new day to care for the family He has blessed me with.
"When she speaks, she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly." This is one I must continue to work on. I do not want idle words pouring from my mouth, but words that are edifying and encouraging. I want to raise my daughters to be strong women of God, and my sons to know how to treat their future wives. I want each of them to know how to run a home in a Godly manner. I want my sister-wives to know that I love them for who they are, and only wish to encourage them to be the women that I know God has made them to be. Never do I want to compare anyone to anyone else. I want each member of my family to be who God made them to be, not like anyone else. I want my wonderful husband to hear words of encouragement from me, not words to tear him down or belittle him. He is a man of God, and I want to bless him daily.
"She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them busy and productive." I don't think anyone here thinks I need anymore work on this one! I just hope they understand I do not "crack the whip" to be mean or nasty, but so that we can work in harmony and keep our home orderly so that we can ENJOY our lives!!! Not to mention, idle hands are the devil's playground!
"Her children respect and bless her, her husband joins in with words of praise: 'Many women have done wonderful things, but you have outclassed them all.'" Most of my children are too young to "bless" me at this point. When I am old, and even gone onto being with my God, I want them to look back on my life and know that I did my best to raise them in a Godly manner; making them all they could be. I want my husband to be proud of me everyday, and see me as a Godly wife.
"Charm can mislead, and beauty quickly fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises." I am not the most beautiful woman in the world, nor do I want to be. I am good at public speaking, but do not have the charm to wow millions. These vanities are empty. I want to live a life that puts God first. I want Him to be the center of my attention, the reason I do everything, and the very purpose of my life here on earth. I do not do this for the glory and adoration I may receive, but for the reason that He deserves my love and adoration. My Savior left his Throne in Heaven- the center of all praise and glory- to take my sin, abuse, depression, illnesses, and everything else off of me. Jesus came to teach me how to live, to die in my place, and to conquer Death so that I can be united with him in Heaven when my life is over. I want to give Him every day of my life.
I am making a lot of changes in my life. I am dressing more modest (I can't dress much more modestly), wearing more skirts and higher cut shirts. I am cutting out soda, and drinking much more water. I will only eat foods that will encourage my body to be healthy (with the occasional chocolate as needed). I want to take care of myself so that I can be around for my children as they grow. I want to be beautiful both inwardly and outwardly for my husband. I want to be proud of the Temple that God has given me to serve Him in while I roam this earth.
"Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it." I do not EVER want to give my dh reason to distrust me, or to question my motives for anything I do. I want my motives and actions to be above reproach at all times.
"She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day." Anyone who knows me, knows that I hate mornings. I do not function well early in the morning. However, now that I have a large family, I must become more diligent is getting up and making sure everyone is fed. Victoria starts school this week. With prayer, I start work this week, also. I am taking it upon myself to ensure that she has a filling breakfast to keep her going until lunch time. If I eat also, I will be less apt to stop at McDonald's for food on my way to work, too.
"She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden." I will be working outside the home. I have chosen to do this for a few reasons, but the most important being that I need a break from this house in order to be a kind, sweet person. I have chosen (or it chose me...) a profession that I am skilled in, and that pays very well. I consider my calling to be an interpreter in ASL to be not only a gift from God to teach His children about Him, but also a wonderful way to care for my family. With the money I will be earning, I will be able to care for my family is a wise way. Father, please show me how to be a faithful steward of the provision You will provide!
"First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, and is in no hurry to call it quits for the day." I have learned that if I stay in my jammies all day, the only thing I want to do is sleep and be lazy. I MUST get up, get dressed and be about my work. When I put on my clothes, it seems to make me more diligent about doing my job. Also, I take pride in making sure that, most days, I dress well. I do not want my husband to look at me and see a slob. I want him to be proud of me, even if I am just at home. I want to look my best, as often as I can, to encourage myself to be the best I can, and to please his eye.
"She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking." I am not prideful about many things, but I am proud that I was wise enough to learn from my Grandma and my Mom how to take care of a home, and how to cook filling, healthy, and inexpensive meals for my family. I am still learning to sew to the skill level I want, but that will come with practice. I still have much to learn, but no one in my home goes hungry!!!
"She doesn't worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks...she designs gowns and sells them...her clothes are well made and elegant, she always faces tomorrow with a smile." I can't wait until I can get my sewing machine and start sewing clothes again. I want to make pajamas for everyone, and even some clothes for Victoria to wear for school and church. I want to dress modestly, covering myself well, as to not let the world see the body that only my husband is to know. I want to make some long skirts for myself, and my sister wives if they wish. I long for my clothes to not only flatter, but to be lovely. I want my husband to look at me and be honored that I am keeping myself for him alone, and looking nice to bring respect to myself, as well as to him. My smile and positive attitude MUST proceed me each day. I want to look at each new day as a blessing from the Lord, and as a new day to care for the family He has blessed me with.
"When she speaks, she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly." This is one I must continue to work on. I do not want idle words pouring from my mouth, but words that are edifying and encouraging. I want to raise my daughters to be strong women of God, and my sons to know how to treat their future wives. I want each of them to know how to run a home in a Godly manner. I want my sister-wives to know that I love them for who they are, and only wish to encourage them to be the women that I know God has made them to be. Never do I want to compare anyone to anyone else. I want each member of my family to be who God made them to be, not like anyone else. I want my wonderful husband to hear words of encouragement from me, not words to tear him down or belittle him. He is a man of God, and I want to bless him daily.
"She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them busy and productive." I don't think anyone here thinks I need anymore work on this one! I just hope they understand I do not "crack the whip" to be mean or nasty, but so that we can work in harmony and keep our home orderly so that we can ENJOY our lives!!! Not to mention, idle hands are the devil's playground!
"Her children respect and bless her, her husband joins in with words of praise: 'Many women have done wonderful things, but you have outclassed them all.'" Most of my children are too young to "bless" me at this point. When I am old, and even gone onto being with my God, I want them to look back on my life and know that I did my best to raise them in a Godly manner; making them all they could be. I want my husband to be proud of me everyday, and see me as a Godly wife.
"Charm can mislead, and beauty quickly fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises." I am not the most beautiful woman in the world, nor do I want to be. I am good at public speaking, but do not have the charm to wow millions. These vanities are empty. I want to live a life that puts God first. I want Him to be the center of my attention, the reason I do everything, and the very purpose of my life here on earth. I do not do this for the glory and adoration I may receive, but for the reason that He deserves my love and adoration. My Savior left his Throne in Heaven- the center of all praise and glory- to take my sin, abuse, depression, illnesses, and everything else off of me. Jesus came to teach me how to live, to die in my place, and to conquer Death so that I can be united with him in Heaven when my life is over. I want to give Him every day of my life.
I am making a lot of changes in my life. I am dressing more modest (I can't dress much more modestly), wearing more skirts and higher cut shirts. I am cutting out soda, and drinking much more water. I will only eat foods that will encourage my body to be healthy (with the occasional chocolate as needed). I want to take care of myself so that I can be around for my children as they grow. I want to be beautiful both inwardly and outwardly for my husband. I want to be proud of the Temple that God has given me to serve Him in while I roam this earth.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Just another manic monday...
Well, the weekend is over. My baby girl is home with me once again. She had a fantastic weekend with her daddy, but I'm happy to have her back with me. Slept so much better knowing she's home with me.
I'm waiting for the phone to ring with an interview at the Janesville School System. Found out about an interpreting job there. Things have gone great up to this point in the proceedings, and I can only assume that the phone interview will go just as well. Only time with tell!
Sitting here, I'm watching my dh on his computer. I'm really worried about him. He misses Wendy so much, and we can't really help him through this pain. We all want to, but his heart is shattered. How do you get someone you love through so much grief? I'm just praying for wisdom and grace. My heart aches for him.
We tried our new schedule this morning. So far, the kids are just tired and cranky. Ah, the joys of the new school year! Victoria goes back Sept 1. We are trying to homeschool the two year olds, and get them ready for pre-k. How in the world do kids grow up so fast???? In some ways, I miss having my little baby. However, what a joy it is to see my little girl grow up and become a young lady day by day.
I'm waiting for the phone to ring with an interview at the Janesville School System. Found out about an interpreting job there. Things have gone great up to this point in the proceedings, and I can only assume that the phone interview will go just as well. Only time with tell!
Sitting here, I'm watching my dh on his computer. I'm really worried about him. He misses Wendy so much, and we can't really help him through this pain. We all want to, but his heart is shattered. How do you get someone you love through so much grief? I'm just praying for wisdom and grace. My heart aches for him.
We tried our new schedule this morning. So far, the kids are just tired and cranky. Ah, the joys of the new school year! Victoria goes back Sept 1. We are trying to homeschool the two year olds, and get them ready for pre-k. How in the world do kids grow up so fast???? In some ways, I miss having my little baby. However, what a joy it is to see my little girl grow up and become a young lady day by day.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Its 12:35 AM on Friday. In just a few hours, I will be taking Willow to see/meet her Dad. I guess I'm on my own for the journey. Ann can't go, Rich is afraid to go, and I don't know if I can handle a fussy baby the whole way back when I'm crying myself. I really hoped that someone would go with me for support, but I am strong enough to go by myself. I can only thank God that He has given me a family that loves and supports me. Without them, I couldn't make it through this weekend.
Willow and Cameron got batteries today for their Power Wheels jeep. Oh my goodness! It was soooo cute!!!! I just need to teach Willow that both feet need to be in it BEFORE she pushes the peddle. She almost ran over her bare foot. Silly kid!
Not too much more is going on. I'm sure I'll have lots to post this weekend with all of my free time. Until then!
Willow and Cameron got batteries today for their Power Wheels jeep. Oh my goodness! It was soooo cute!!!! I just need to teach Willow that both feet need to be in it BEFORE she pushes the peddle. She almost ran over her bare foot. Silly kid!
Not too much more is going on. I'm sure I'll have lots to post this weekend with all of my free time. Until then!
Friday, August 13, 2010
A man has an affair and walks out on his wife and 15 month old daughter. 6 months later, he returns for 2 weeks, saying he wants to reconcile. He then chooses to leave again, not to be seen or heard from in 9 months. No child support is paid. Few phone calls are exchanged. Out of the blue, he calls his wife up, and they agree to move back in together to get on their feet, then go their seperate ways. Soon after this agreement, the wife falls in love and moves out of state with the child, now near 3 years of age. Once the husband learns of the situation, he all of a sudden wants custody of the child if the wife does not return to the home state.
How does this man think, after a year and a half away from his child that he has any right to demand custody?
How does this man think, after a year and a half away from his child that he has any right to demand custody?
If I could have but one wish, it would be for people to understand that I am happy and safe. No one seems to understand that my life in this home is not the Hollywood idea of polygamy. That misconception is the hardest thing in the world for me to deal with. Everyone at home seems to think that I'm going to hell because I'm sinning. Um, yeah, I am a sinner. I'm also saved by grace. We all are. I'm not living a life that is forbidden in Scripture. Actually, I can find more to back it up than I can to dismiss it! Ugh.
I'm also dealing with the remnants of a broken marriage. Never in my life did I think that I would have to deal with a divorce, and especially not visitation stuff. But, I guess I was naive to think that fairy tales really do exist. Willow will see her dad next weekend for the first time in over a year. The last day we saw him was the day he moved north. Last time, she took to him like a duck takes to water. This time, I don't know how she will react. I know that when I turn around to leave and head home, she's going to scream and cry. I know I'll cry. I've never spent a night without her, let alone a weekend. She's had such a hard time sleeping lately, that I'm afraid she's going to give him quite a run for his money. She doesn't like to sleep without me, and will probably wake up a few times at night crying because I'm not there.
Also, he and I just can't have a civil conversation. I just wish he would understand that I have not put his daughter in a situation that is going to cause her pain or end in abuse. This family is loving, not scary. I just want people to see that.
I'm also dealing with the remnants of a broken marriage. Never in my life did I think that I would have to deal with a divorce, and especially not visitation stuff. But, I guess I was naive to think that fairy tales really do exist. Willow will see her dad next weekend for the first time in over a year. The last day we saw him was the day he moved north. Last time, she took to him like a duck takes to water. This time, I don't know how she will react. I know that when I turn around to leave and head home, she's going to scream and cry. I know I'll cry. I've never spent a night without her, let alone a weekend. She's had such a hard time sleeping lately, that I'm afraid she's going to give him quite a run for his money. She doesn't like to sleep without me, and will probably wake up a few times at night crying because I'm not there.
Also, he and I just can't have a civil conversation. I just wish he would understand that I have not put his daughter in a situation that is going to cause her pain or end in abuse. This family is loving, not scary. I just want people to see that.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
made up a new recipe for dinner tonight. we will see how it goes over, but its inexpensive and filling. thats the important part!
2 boxes au gratin potatoes
1 lbs bacon, cut and cooked
1.5 lbs chicken breast, cubed and cooked
shredded chedder cheese
mix potatoes up to box directions, add bacon, chicken, cheese. back 35 min at 400 degrees.
Right now, its in the oven. Im bouncing TJ oin my leg because all he wants to do is be held 24/7! Ann and B went to pick up meds, and dh is in and out of the house working on the backyard. I havent had to balance all the kids (minus one) and cook dinner since i moved in. Wow, that makes me feel kinda SPOILED!
Group interview went very well today. I hasdnt been away from the buiding 90 min and they called me for my one-on-one interview! Tuesday at 1. Im excited, but nervous, too. 12 hour shifts seem a bit daunting after not working since March. God knows what I can handle!
Well, Ill update with the dinner results later. Off to find a veggie to serve...
2 boxes au gratin potatoes
1 lbs bacon, cut and cooked
1.5 lbs chicken breast, cubed and cooked
shredded chedder cheese
mix potatoes up to box directions, add bacon, chicken, cheese. back 35 min at 400 degrees.
Right now, its in the oven. Im bouncing TJ oin my leg because all he wants to do is be held 24/7! Ann and B went to pick up meds, and dh is in and out of the house working on the backyard. I havent had to balance all the kids (minus one) and cook dinner since i moved in. Wow, that makes me feel kinda SPOILED!
Group interview went very well today. I hasdnt been away from the buiding 90 min and they called me for my one-on-one interview! Tuesday at 1. Im excited, but nervous, too. 12 hour shifts seem a bit daunting after not working since March. God knows what I can handle!
Well, Ill update with the dinner results later. Off to find a veggie to serve...
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Is it strange to be in mourning for someone you never met? My DH had been talking to a woman for a long time, and had lost contact with her all of a sudden. Her Myspace shut down, and all communication was lost. He just assumed that she just wanted nothing to do with him. Broke his heart, but he understood. However, we just found out that she had returned from military service and had turned down a promotion so that she could move closer. Sadly, we didn't find this out from her. The woman who was to become my new sister wife was tragically killed in a one car accident. She was laid to rest in family ground in the Holy Land of Israel. May her soul be at peace with her Creator. She is missed by her family, and by my husband. May we be together in Heaven someday!
As for the rest of my day...pretty boring. Tomorrow, however, I have a job interview at Quad Graphics. Praying for the best!
As for the rest of my day...pretty boring. Tomorrow, however, I have a job interview at Quad Graphics. Praying for the best!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Been another interesting day in the household. I was woken up to a phone call from my ex letting me know that he's moving back to his home terminal, and will only be 2 hours away. Great for visitation, but does he have to be so rude? I know he wants to see Willow, and I'll make every reasonable accomodation. He's just so forceful about it. Oh well. Thus is my life.
I pretty much took the day off from everything. I sewed a skirt, but dh isn't real thrilled with it. Oh well, I think its cute :-D Frozen pizza for supper, while my sisters were at the laundrymat. Tomorrow, I'm going to do my laundry and all the bedding. Fun fun.
Talked to a new family tonight. Seems like they are having some scary issues with in-laws. Someday people will understand that our lives are not that much different. Its just heartbreaking to hear that a family is being seperated just because close minded people can't mind their own business.
Also found out that two of my friends from college are getting divorced. I really thought they would make it. No one is perfect. My heart is heavy tonight.
I think I'll head upstairs to my room early tonight. I need some God time. I need a revelation, or just a really big hug from Heaven. Good night blogworld!
I pretty much took the day off from everything. I sewed a skirt, but dh isn't real thrilled with it. Oh well, I think its cute :-D Frozen pizza for supper, while my sisters were at the laundrymat. Tomorrow, I'm going to do my laundry and all the bedding. Fun fun.
Talked to a new family tonight. Seems like they are having some scary issues with in-laws. Someday people will understand that our lives are not that much different. Its just heartbreaking to hear that a family is being seperated just because close minded people can't mind their own business.
Also found out that two of my friends from college are getting divorced. I really thought they would make it. No one is perfect. My heart is heavy tonight.
I think I'll head upstairs to my room early tonight. I need some God time. I need a revelation, or just a really big hug from Heaven. Good night blogworld!
Friday, August 6, 2010
I have so much on my mind tonight, but I can't really pinpoint anything specific! Such an annoying status :-(. I keep sleeping in too late, so I feel like I'm not accomplishing much. However, I am still cleaning house and cooking dinner. So, I guess I'm not completely useless, haha. No, I'm not depressed or anything. I just have my days and nights confused. I'm setting my alarm in the morning to get up early. And, to keep me to that, I'm making doughnuts for breakfast.
I had such a rough day yesterday. My ex husband called and just yelled at me for putting his daughter in a situation like this. Yeah, he doesn't like my family set-up either. So, after I was able to calm down a little bit, Rich was able to assure me that everything will be fine. I just have to convince myself that I will not be left again. That will take a lifetime, a day by day struggle.
Sounds like we are heading to Indian mounds tomorrow. I'm really excited. I grew up going to Cahokia mounds in Illinois, and the ones here in Wisconsin are groups that broke off from the Illinois settlement. I hated going as a kid, but now that I'm older and have learned to love history. Maybe I can come to a better understanding of some things tomorrow. We shall see!
My patience is thin tonight. One part of such a big family is the lack of quiet in this house. There is always something going on. Its 11:30 PM, and almost everyone is still awake. Since the computer I mainly use is in the living room, I'm still in the middle of chaos. B is trying to get TJ to go to sleep, while we are watching a movie. My humble opinoin is that if he needs to go to sleep (he's only 7 months old), she needs to cuddle him in her bedroom where its quiet. The middle of the living room with a loud movie is not the best place to get a baby to sleep. But, that's just my opinoin.
I need to go get mine to bed. She's still WIDE awake. OH, but we made a big step in the right direction today!!! Willow used the bathroom!!! Yeah, I'm probably over excited, but I'm tired of buying so many diapers. My baby is growing up! Hard to belive she's almost 3 years old already.
Well, need to finish my starter and get to bed. If they turn out, I'll post the recipe on here tomorrow. Blessings!
I had such a rough day yesterday. My ex husband called and just yelled at me for putting his daughter in a situation like this. Yeah, he doesn't like my family set-up either. So, after I was able to calm down a little bit, Rich was able to assure me that everything will be fine. I just have to convince myself that I will not be left again. That will take a lifetime, a day by day struggle.
Sounds like we are heading to Indian mounds tomorrow. I'm really excited. I grew up going to Cahokia mounds in Illinois, and the ones here in Wisconsin are groups that broke off from the Illinois settlement. I hated going as a kid, but now that I'm older and have learned to love history. Maybe I can come to a better understanding of some things tomorrow. We shall see!
My patience is thin tonight. One part of such a big family is the lack of quiet in this house. There is always something going on. Its 11:30 PM, and almost everyone is still awake. Since the computer I mainly use is in the living room, I'm still in the middle of chaos. B is trying to get TJ to go to sleep, while we are watching a movie. My humble opinoin is that if he needs to go to sleep (he's only 7 months old), she needs to cuddle him in her bedroom where its quiet. The middle of the living room with a loud movie is not the best place to get a baby to sleep. But, that's just my opinoin.
I need to go get mine to bed. She's still WIDE awake. OH, but we made a big step in the right direction today!!! Willow used the bathroom!!! Yeah, I'm probably over excited, but I'm tired of buying so many diapers. My baby is growing up! Hard to belive she's almost 3 years old already.
Well, need to finish my starter and get to bed. If they turn out, I'll post the recipe on here tomorrow. Blessings!
Monday, August 2, 2010
I love my Restoration Movement roots...
If you read my first entry, you know that my husband and first sister wife are Mormon. So, I decided to meet with the Missionaries and learn more about the faith of my family. I can now say I've actually read the Book of Mormon. And, boy, did I have a LOT of questions!!!
One of the first things I noticed is that the language of the book, the very syntax and grammer used does not vary AT ALL. Reading the Scriptures, you can tell who is writting. Each inspired author of the Bible had his own style of writting. Perfect case is the Harmony of the Gospels (Thanks Doc Henderson!). These 4 books were written about the same events, near the same time, about the same person. The styles are no where near the same! Matthew was a tax collector, he wrote as a common person. Mark was young, and wrote as a young man. Luke was a doctor, and wrote as a learned man. John was the closest to Jesus and wrote as a personal friend. And, NO ONE rights like Paul, with his run on sentances. And that's just a few books of the 66!
Joseph Smiths "translation" of the golden plates has the same sentance structure all the way through. 2600 years BEFORE Jesus was born, He is refered to as Christ. It is even said that His followers were to be called "Christians". Um, last time I checked, the word christian was a derogetory name made up by the Romans. It was never held in high regard. Its a troublesome read, as every few sentances you run into the phrase "and it came to pass". I mean, I must have read the statement over 1000 times, and thats not an exageration. Its like Joseph Smith just made it all up. I guess its not too hard to write a book, even for a young man.
These words will probably hang heavy on my husband's heart, but I just can't believe it. It doesn't hold the truth that I know to be real. I am a Follower of Christ, and I will search until I find the church I am to go to.
One of the first things I noticed is that the language of the book, the very syntax and grammer used does not vary AT ALL. Reading the Scriptures, you can tell who is writting. Each inspired author of the Bible had his own style of writting. Perfect case is the Harmony of the Gospels (Thanks Doc Henderson!). These 4 books were written about the same events, near the same time, about the same person. The styles are no where near the same! Matthew was a tax collector, he wrote as a common person. Mark was young, and wrote as a young man. Luke was a doctor, and wrote as a learned man. John was the closest to Jesus and wrote as a personal friend. And, NO ONE rights like Paul, with his run on sentances. And that's just a few books of the 66!
Joseph Smiths "translation" of the golden plates has the same sentance structure all the way through. 2600 years BEFORE Jesus was born, He is refered to as Christ. It is even said that His followers were to be called "Christians". Um, last time I checked, the word christian was a derogetory name made up by the Romans. It was never held in high regard. Its a troublesome read, as every few sentances you run into the phrase "and it came to pass". I mean, I must have read the statement over 1000 times, and thats not an exageration. Its like Joseph Smith just made it all up. I guess its not too hard to write a book, even for a young man.
These words will probably hang heavy on my husband's heart, but I just can't believe it. It doesn't hold the truth that I know to be real. I am a Follower of Christ, and I will search until I find the church I am to go to.
I must decrease, so Christ can increase...
Those words by John that Baptist ring in my heart every once in a while. I must become less and less, so that Christ can become greater. That is a hard thing to do! I've never really been a prideful person, and my friends growing up can attest to that. I knew where my strengths were (mainly musical), but I was shy and very backwards. Definately shunned at school for my outward faith. It was actually very easy to not be prideful in that, as I was teased relentlessly for being who I was.
However, I've noticed since moving here, I'm becoming prideful in my abilities as a homemaker. As I've alluded to before, my sister-wives can't really cook much. Neither are real motivated to clean most days (girls, I said MOST days...don't freak out on me). Now, my mother will be SHOCKED to hear that I cleaned the other apartment when we moved into our home. See, at her house, I hated keeping my room clean. It just took way too much effort, and meant I had to be alone. Two things I hated as a teenager. When I was a single mom, I was terrible at keeping up with the dishes, as I was exhausted by the time I got off work and cooked dinner. I hate to admit that dishes would pile up for weeks, usually getting done by my parents because I'd just get overwhelmed.
Its these reminders that I must keep in mind daily. It wasn't long ago at all that I wanted to do nothing but sit around all day and play with my daughter. However, I'm in a household of 9 now! There isn't time to sit around all day and get things done at the same time. I get so frustrated at my sister wives because all they seem to do is sit, or take care of the babies ( 4 months and 6 months). Pride stared me in the eye tonight as I realized that I am here for a reason.
I am not here to condemn, or to come down on them for lack of motivation. The Bible tells us that older women are to train younger women in life. I must realize that my sister wives are younger than me in the area of homemaking. Even though Ann is by age older, she was never taught. Brandy is younger, and we have much to teach her. I am here to love my family, as well as train these women up. Also, I have two daughters that we must train to be Godly women who can run a home. So far, we have taught them nothing. Before I married my DH, Willow was taught to pick her toys up every night before bed, and even before meals. I became lazy when I moved here because of how the house is run. That must end.
I was also confronted by the Holy Spirit tonight, that I must lead by example. If I want my family to be more spiritual, I must be. I must get in the habit of Bible Study daily (something I have ALWAYS struggled with), and teaching these children about the Love of God. Our two-year-olds are going to begin basic homeschooling activities very soon, and I am going to have an age appropriate religion lesson with them, also. They were given to us for a reason, and it is our responsibility to ensure they are trained in the right way.
Wow...i have a lot of "dying" to do....
I'd love to continue sitting around all day, playing on the computer and watching tv, but I'm letting precious time go by. I must run this home the way God has called me to do it. If I do not care for the tasks He has given me, I will loose the blessings He has poured out. That's a hard revelation to take in. I must be faithful in the little things before He will trust me with more.
Please, Lord Jesus, help me become the Woman of God that You want me to be. Show me how to die daily, so that You may live through me.
However, I've noticed since moving here, I'm becoming prideful in my abilities as a homemaker. As I've alluded to before, my sister-wives can't really cook much. Neither are real motivated to clean most days (girls, I said MOST days...don't freak out on me). Now, my mother will be SHOCKED to hear that I cleaned the other apartment when we moved into our home. See, at her house, I hated keeping my room clean. It just took way too much effort, and meant I had to be alone. Two things I hated as a teenager. When I was a single mom, I was terrible at keeping up with the dishes, as I was exhausted by the time I got off work and cooked dinner. I hate to admit that dishes would pile up for weeks, usually getting done by my parents because I'd just get overwhelmed.
Its these reminders that I must keep in mind daily. It wasn't long ago at all that I wanted to do nothing but sit around all day and play with my daughter. However, I'm in a household of 9 now! There isn't time to sit around all day and get things done at the same time. I get so frustrated at my sister wives because all they seem to do is sit, or take care of the babies ( 4 months and 6 months). Pride stared me in the eye tonight as I realized that I am here for a reason.
I am not here to condemn, or to come down on them for lack of motivation. The Bible tells us that older women are to train younger women in life. I must realize that my sister wives are younger than me in the area of homemaking. Even though Ann is by age older, she was never taught. Brandy is younger, and we have much to teach her. I am here to love my family, as well as train these women up. Also, I have two daughters that we must train to be Godly women who can run a home. So far, we have taught them nothing. Before I married my DH, Willow was taught to pick her toys up every night before bed, and even before meals. I became lazy when I moved here because of how the house is run. That must end.
I was also confronted by the Holy Spirit tonight, that I must lead by example. If I want my family to be more spiritual, I must be. I must get in the habit of Bible Study daily (something I have ALWAYS struggled with), and teaching these children about the Love of God. Our two-year-olds are going to begin basic homeschooling activities very soon, and I am going to have an age appropriate religion lesson with them, also. They were given to us for a reason, and it is our responsibility to ensure they are trained in the right way.
Wow...i have a lot of "dying" to do....
I'd love to continue sitting around all day, playing on the computer and watching tv, but I'm letting precious time go by. I must run this home the way God has called me to do it. If I do not care for the tasks He has given me, I will loose the blessings He has poured out. That's a hard revelation to take in. I must be faithful in the little things before He will trust me with more.
Please, Lord Jesus, help me become the Woman of God that You want me to be. Show me how to die daily, so that You may live through me.
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